By Philip Kay

Many people believe that if the subject of homosexuality weren't brought up in the media or in the schools then young people wouldn't have the questions, fears, doubts, and prejudices that they do-they simply wouldn't concern themselves with it at all. The stories in this anthology, written by teenagers, suggest otherwise. These young writers encounter gay people and anti-gay prejudice in many areas of their lives. They tell stories about gay uncles, sisters, teammates, and friends. They speak of being labeled lesbian because of the way they dress, of seeing two men kissing on the sidewalk, and of the confusion that results from these kinds of experiences. Others describe what it's like to grow up to discover something literally unspeakable going on inside of them and the struggle to make sense of and accept their own homosexuality.

What all of these writers together make clear is that adults cannot hide the essential fact of homosexuality from young people. The term "faggot" is familiar to them from the moment they hit the schoolyard. By the time they enter their teens, most of them already know someone who is gay or lesbian (or rumored to be) and virtually all of them have opinions and burning questions on the subject. Instead of helping them to answer these questions and to test and refine their opinions, however, we have made the whole subject a giant taboo. Many teenagers are convinced that expressing even the slightest interest or compassion will bring them nothing but trouble.

Starting a classroom discussion or a heart-to-heart talk in this kind of atmosphere is a daunting task. That's why we've put together this anthology-to give you and the young people you work with a number of different places to start. We've included the testimonies of teens from a variety of ethnic, religious, and class backgrounds-gay teens, straight teens, and teens who aren't sure-as they struggle to confront the issues for themselves. There are explorations of such questions as how someone comes to discover he or she is a homosexual, why some young men engage in gaybashing, and whether it's acceptable for a man to dress in women's clothes. We hope that the stories strike familiar chords among your students, that they are able to identify with the writers' openness, courage, and personal strength as well as with their fears and confusion. We also hope they will be challenged and inspired by the many ways the authors and subjects of the stories have grown.

The book is organized in five principal sections:

1. That Gay Thing This section explores a range of questions about homosexuality and young people's relationships to it: How can a teenager tell if he or she is gay? Is it contagious? What are some of the common myths and misconceptions about homosexuality and is there any truth to them? How do you deal with gays and lesbians when you come across them? What do you say to the people who hate them, call them names, or worse? The writers don't provide definitive answers to these questions; more often than not they just document where they are in their own individual searches.

2. Friends and Family After a "speakout" by a variety of teens on how they would deal with finding out someone close to them is gay, we offer personal stories by young people who've actually faced that situation in their families and among their peers. Sandra Leon describes how she helped her mother come to terms with the fact that her sister is a lesbian. Archie Harris describes how he helped his gay friend Peter with his problems, first by being a good listener and later by taking him to a drop-in center for gay and lesbian youth. Many of these stories offer a blueprint for how to be supportive when you find out someone close to you is gay.

3. Coming Out These testimonials document the experiences of gay, lesbian and bisexual youth as they struggle to find a name for their powerful feelings, to understand and accept the truth about themselves, and to negotiate an often hostile world. David Miranda writes about how he hated himself so much for what he was that he tried to take his own life. Gina Trapani and Wilber Valenzuela talk about the search for friends and caring adults who could support them.

4. Homophobia This chapter begins with the story of how close friendships among a group of high school gymnasts disintegrate after one of the friends reveals he is gay. It continues with stories of young people who've suffered not only lost friendships but harassment and discrimination by family members and adults charged with their care. The section culminates with a discussion of gaybashing, the violent extension of what often begins as unfriendliness, name-calling and other, lesser forms of prejudice.

5. Gender Benders No discussion of homosexuality would be complete without addressing society's assumptions about what is appropriate behavior for men and women. This section includes an exploration of drag queens, bearded women, vogueing--people and customs that stand traditional gender roles on their heads. There's also a story by a young woman who is frequently mistaken for a lesbian because of the way she dresses, a gay man whose walls are covered with pictures of beautiful women, and a young man who finds himself in the uncomfortable position of having a young woman come on to him in the street.

At New Youth Connections and Foster Care Youth United, the two magazines from which these stories are taken, we also publish stories about rap music, college and careers, race relations… anything and everything that will help our young writers and readers answer the questions, "Who am I?", "What kind of person do I want to become?" and "What do I have to do to get there?" Many of the stories in this anthology address not only the sexual dimension of these questions, but larger issues as well: having the courage to ask difficult questions, to hold unpopular views, the willingness to trust one's instincts and be oneself. The writers grapple with the choice between growing up to be open and tolerant and the choice to become ignorant and hateful. Can one disagree with or disapprove of people and still respect them? Where do you draw the line? At the end of the book we've included a section called Resources for Teachers to help you identify a variety of approaches to the material.

We don't know what it is that makes a particular person gay or straight, but we do know that sexual orientation is something that certainly cannot be taught. More importantly, we know from years of listening closely to teenagers' longings, fears, and deepest secrets that there are gay kids or kids with gay people in their lives in virtually every classroom and every afterschool program, every football team and video arcade. We know the subject comes up (or resounds with its silence) in many areas of their lives. We know it, and young people know it, and we feel we have a responsibility as educators to acknowledge it. We hope this book will provide the basis for conversations in classrooms, youth centers, living rooms, and group homes-conversations that prepare teenagers to deal with homosexuality constructively and on their own terms, wherever and however they encounter it.