FCYU-Feature Story

Keeping My Head Up
When I got pregnant no one had my back.

By Shacara Hudson

Did you ever hear the phrase "babies having babies?"

When I got pregnant, people told me that all the time. They said I was too young and stupid to have a child. They would ask questions like, "What will you do if the father leaves?" "How will you support the baby?" and my favorite one, "Are you staying in school?" Everyone in my family was upset with me. My grandmother and mother were very strung out about my pregnancy and no one had my back.

It all started when my family found out. They had repeatedly asked me if I was pregnant and I denied it. But I was, and I called my boyfriend crying, telling him I was four months pregnant. Two weeks later, my grandmother woke me up and told me to get dressed. She took me to get an abortion. But I just couldn't go through with it.

My pregnancy was stressful. I had problems getting to the clinic for my appointments. No one wanted to help me. My grandmother told me I couldn't live with her anymore. I told my child's paternal grandmother my situation, and she took me in. Two weeks later, I gave birth.

After my baby was born, the stress continued. I lost a lot of weight. I had moved in with a foster mother, and she was just too strict, something I wasn't used to. I ended up in a center for parenting teens. That was more stress because there were too many girls to be around, and no one liked me. They said I had a nasty attitude. It was just stress on top of stress.

When I arrived at the center, my grades were all Fs. But then I enrolled in prep school and began to get good grades that I couldn't even believe were mine. So my advice to teen parents is no matter how hard it may seem, never stop going to school. Always stay strong and don't let people pull you down.

I enrolled in Howard Area Community Center Alternative High School and started doing great. I made the honor roll every time and graduated in January 2005. The way I've stayed strong is by knowing I have to be strong for my daughter. It's all about her. You have to be a good role model and a good parent because it's all a chain reaction.

Reprinted from Residents' Journal, a publication for and by Chicago public housing residents.